How To Make Peace With Your Regrets

This is the text of the sermon I delivered on the morning of the Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. At the bottom you can click to hear the audio recording  of the sermon as delivered.


The most popular musical in the country when I was in college was Rent. Perhaps you saw it. It was not as edgy as, say, the Book of Mormon, but it had its moments.

One of its most popular songs was called “Another Day.” It is a paean to the idea of carpe diem, seize the day. You know the idea. Today is the only day we have. Make the most of it.

Such advice usually comes along with the encouragement to live without any regrets. One verse in the song says,

There’s only us
There’s only this
Forget regret
Or life is yours to miss

“Forget regret?” Is that really possible? Can we really live—make choices, form relationships, do important work—and have no regrets? To explore this question, let us turn to the biblical story we just read.

What You Need to Know About Rosh Hashanah

On Wednesday night and Thursday, Jews around the world will celebrate the holiday of Rosh Hashanah, which literally means “Head of the Year.”

shofar (1)

What distinguishes Rosh Hashanah from every other holiday is the sounding of ancient ram’s horn, known as a shofar. It makes a scratchy, plaintive primitive sound. To hear it is the primary purpose of this day.

Even people can’t make it to synagogue try to hear the sound of the shofar. Rabbis have been known to visit hospitals and sound the shofar in patients’ rooms.

How I Became a Wounded Healer

In seminary we read a famous book called The Wounded Healer. Written by Father Henri Nouwen, it was based on an idea of psychologist Carl Jung.

wounded healer

The idea is that  effective pastors and therapists draw from their own wounds and pain in order to empathize with another. Their own pain gives them a unique window into the feelings of their patient or parishioner.

I was initially dubious of the idea. Every pain or tragedy or illness is unique. We can never enter fully into another’s feelings.

Over time, however, I realized it is not so simple. I realized that behind my initial suspicion was a unhealthy aloofness.

The Secret to Healing from Pain

I sat with the two children of a mother who had just passed away. They were recounting her life for me in preparation for the funeral.


As we spoke, the mother’s long-time caretaker came into the room. She began to speak about their relationship. Though her English was not perfect, the three of us sat spell-bound.

A Sad Journey

She described how she moved to Chicago from Belize after her youngest son died.

Why We Still Love Fiddler on the Roof

As I child I could not sit through movies or meals. Sitting through a musical was out of the question.


Yet, when I was seven, my parents decided to take me to see Fiddler on the Roof. Looking back now as parent of a seven-year-old, I would not have been so bold.

Since that first experience, I have been I love with this story. I’ve seen the musical four times and the movie at least half a dozen. It’s one of my favorite resources for classes and sermons on Jewish tradition and history.

And I am not alone. 

Does Religion Cause War?

Deadly images on television tear at our heart. We wish for the violence in Israel to end.

War and Religion seem to get along. The truth is not so simple.

This land, sacred to three global religions, seems endlessly mired in conflict. Does religion just promote division or hatred? Is it because of its religious significance that Israel remains a place of tension? Or is faith, at its core, a force of peace?

If we listen to most voices in the media and pop culture, we would answer this question without hesitation. Religion is bad, primitive, and dangerous.

We would agree with late writer Christopher Hitchens, who said “The Bible

How to Speak Our Truth: A Spiritual Lesson from Robin Williams’ Dead Poets Society

Coming home recently on a long flight, I had the chance to watch the classic film Dead Poet’s Society.

robin dps

One of the late Robin William’s most poignant films, it tells the story of a charismatic teacher who unleashes the passions of students at a New England Prep School.

The Jewish Genius of Robin Williams: 4 Examples

In Jewish tradition we have a special greeting for a genius. Upon meeting such a person, we say, Blessed are You, Eternal God, Source of Life, who has given from His wisdom to flesh and blood. 

Had I ever met Robin Williams, I would surely have said it.

Robin Williams tweeted this picture of himself last year and said "Rabbi Robin?"

Williams was a singular genius. He brought joy and comfort to so many. Yet, that same joy and satisfaction continued to elude him.

A debate with another Rabbi over the Israel and Gaza turned into a seminar on the history of Zionism and Israel. Glad I stayed awake in rabbinical school.

Which Book of the Bible Should You Start With?

The Bible was never meant to be studied alone. This past year, a Christian colleague and I gathered periodically to study. He suggested we explore Deuteronomy.


The study expanded us both. While we differ in our view of the Old Testament, we both came to see Deuteronomy as strikingly modern. The God it describes is accessible and universal.

The moral vision it presents challenges and enlarges us. The society it reflects resembles our own.

If you are Christian or a Jew beginning to study the Old Testament, I suggest starting with Deuteronomy.
Here’s what you might discover.